Mirror, mirror, there is someone uglier than me?

I have to confess something, sometimes I am ashamed of myself,
this happens from time to time, because I know I'm not as nice as that hunk of Hollywood cinema, named Tom Cruz, Tom Cruiz or will be, I think for the moment is not so relevant.
In contrast, there are days that I think more beautiful than Leonardo of Capri, and these days I spend hours and hours in front of the mirror, those that reflect the entire body, from head to toe, just flirting with me.
And the insanity goes further, because I'm comparing my eyes with those of Capri and my chest with the Cross Cruizer or will?
Can you imagine that the winner of this marathon to compete the title of Mr. Universe, at least in my sick mind, the winner is always me and little me da silva!
The madness goes further, and I can even hear that famous presenter Larry Kingman advertising, "and the winner is Paul Rk!
I must confess a special when I'm in deep delusion about to freak out, I have orgasms just enjoy myself with old clothes and shabby, I am so upset with my own "beauty", which will further, dare to be completely naked in front the mirror.
That's right, as I came into the world, totally naked, oh my dear friends, the consequences are tragic, no one takes me there.
What tava bad gets worse, and the house may be on fire, the world may be ending, but I'm totally entranced, I forget everything else, completely losing the sense of the ridiculous.
A very strong emotion, an ecstatic, almost like an orgasm, I wonder, and repeating in my mind, if I am not the incarnation of that character in Greek mythology called Narcissus.
Hypnotized by your own reflection, eventually dying the river and where a flower was born later that led to your name.
Inevitably the most entertaining thoughts invade my subconscious and I wonder if I die here in this room, in front of the mirror that has followed my family for generations, that flower would be born?
An orchid, no, I think I'm being arrogant, I think she would have one of those pretty ugly cactus, those that look like a porcupine, proportionally ridiculous my real condition.
I recently had a revelation "bombshell", chatting with some friends who match the standards of beauty, the kind, clear eyes, and a metro tra-la-la in height and athleticism, they vented me feel horrible that once in a while .
I immediately thought that they were taking one with my face, but in fact I could analyze their behavior in those "moments" of ugliness.
Extremely shy, how I acted in many cases.
As I often vent and again that old contradiction in my head, that eternal knot that never loosens.
I was drinking a bit of ancient philosophy, which says that everything in life as the material beauty is ephemeral and relative.
The state of being beautiful is a spiritual state, no matter how much you can bear a standard of physical beauty, coveted and desired by all, we will never be beautiful if not cultivate true inherent beauty.
Thank you for reading until the last paragraph.
Paul RkSp